http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=beat

im using this system from now on..............

i've warned Alex..........warn your chillun to act right when i'm around

The one-handed chauffeur reach around. A quick reach around while you're driving to smack your kid and his friends too if they disrespect. Swerve the car back and forth for the full effect.

I have that one happen to me a couple of times.

I know the internet was not around when I was a kid growing up. So where the hell did my Dad get this info from?

I guess my Dad wasn't so bad, I never got the "sucker punch" and I must have not been so bad either 'cause I never got the "2x4" treatment.

Good stuff and it works! I got my ass beat, and I turned out ok....fuck off those of you that will comment here. i.e. SteveO,G,MudHound,etc.. :bat: :whip:

I think Crux has "dane braimage"


I perfected the thump years ago.... have not moved it to the skull just yet, t seems to be effective just about anywhere it it placed.

Now the 5 across and the one-two are interesting... might have to bring those in to the game.

my wife and kids fear the finger flick.

two that I would add to that list...

The Ninja Spank. You warn your kids in public that when they get home they will get a spanking. You then don't mention it the rest of the time in public or the ride home. You unlock the door to the house and step inside behind the door and wind up. As the kids walks by you Ninja Spank his ass with a full swing that he can't dodge or parry or even pucker up. Tip: If more than one kid will get this make sure to distract one to enter the house a minute or so later. Example: Get the garbage can from the curb.

Choose Your Weapon. Tell the child to go outside and bring back something for his spanking. The common choice for 1st timers is a very small twig from the tree. This is actually a very good instrument of pain as it acts like a whip breaking the sound barrier if correctly used. A big branch will knock the kid out so you don't even have to hear them cry. A garden hose is my weapon of choice. I like the psychological torture that is given by having the child make the choice.

I was a student of the thin twig on more than one occassion!! LOL!!

Bizarro wrote:

two that I would add to that list... The Ninja Spank. You warn your kids in public that when they get home they will get a spanking. You then don't mention it the rest of the time in public or the ride home. You unlock the door to the house and step inside behind the door and wind up. As the kids walks by you Ninja Spank his ass with a full swing that he can't dodge or parry or even pucker up. Tip: If more than one kid will get this make sure to distract one to enter the house a minute or so later. Example: Get the garbage can from the curb. Choose Your Weapon. Tell the child to go outside and bring back something for his spanking. The common choice for 1st timers is a very small twig from the tree. This is actually a very good instrument of pain as it acts like a whip breaking the sound barrier if correctly used. A big branch will knock the kid out so you don't even have to hear them cry. A garden hose is my weapon of choice. I like the psychological torture that is given by having the child make the choice.

You guys had it easy...we just got our asses whooped before we ever left the house. A sorta just - in - case - you - act - a - foo - ass whoopin'!